Snapshots

In the last 6 months, we have:

been underground, been on top of snowy peaks, been across the world, played yard football, played city league football, watched Boomer football, been mad as hatters, baked topsy-turvy cakes, had family hikes, celebrated Christmas, enjoyed the best of friends, turned 3 years old, started college, finished high school, baked barbie cakes, been to dance competitions, worked, played, been to Hollywood Boulevard, fell down, played in recitals, rode bikes on Venice boardwalk, explored Joshua Tree, ended up in Palm Springs, worshipped inside and out, helped a friend, been to horse camp, hung out with friends, gotten wet, stayed dry, danced with joy and pain, laughed, cried, slept, ate, played, prayed, dreamt, held hands, held each other up, loved each other, made memories that will last a lifetime, and been blessed beyond measure.

The School of Hard Knocks

Things I learned at Camp RedCloud this summer:

*I'd rather sleep on the floor than in a bunk bed with a plastic-ish mattress.
*My girls amaze me!
*Logan knows the lyrics to any song I can name...even the ones from the 80s...and he's 14!
*Some people need to learn to trust in things outside of themselves and some people need to learn to trust in themselves.
*I could really get into a daily hour long quiet time outside in the mountains.
*Fear is a strong motivator, but apparently so is pride.
*I wasn't really trusting cables and carabiners and ropes, I was trusting the people who told me those cables and carabiners and ropes would hold ten times my weight.
*I have a hard time letting people figure things out for themselves...I want to rush in with my Wonder Woman magic lasso and rescue them.
*People get belligerent and rude when pushed to do something that scares them.
*My God owns the cattle on a thousand hills and He will meet my needs!
*I'm fatter than I thought I was.
*I would rather climb a thousand rock walls, rappel from insane heights, drop from a 50 ft. platform and swing like a pendulum, or climb a 14er every day than deal with the daily grind.
*I NEED to write. I'm drowning without this outlet.
*My Lulu is tough as nails. She has a fierce determination not to give in to her fear.
*I cry more for other people than I do for myself.
*I'm a dork. And, guess what? I like myself that way.
*BIFF means "bathroom in forest floor."

*It's a tradition to kiss the carabiners at the top of your climb...AND, the carabiners taste like salt and metal.
*I don't like to be taken care of, but sometimes I need to be...and that's OKAY.
*Your rappelling instructor means it when he says not to hold onto the rope in front of you...major rope burn.
*Shout "pillar" BEFORE you pop a squat, because even though "pillar" means to look away, people's initial reaction is to look toward the person hollering "pillar!"
*Fear the hook. Argh!
*I'm a sucker for a silly camp song.
*Having anyone other than Jason belay me makes me pretty nervous.
*I'm addicted to the Internet, caffeine, salt, and my husband.
*Bella isn't (just) bossy...she is a natural leader.
*Sometimes I need to quit talking to God and just listen.
*It isn't love that makes the world go 'round...actually it's cheese.
*Paul is a mountain man deluxe!
*Things that are easy are never as rewarding to accomplish as things that are difficult.
*It is possible to pop a squat off the weather port deck without actually leaving the decking, but it's surprisingly difficult.
*Fear can paralyze us in more than one way.
*A surprising number of girls grow into teenagers and even into women without ever learning the fine art of peeing outdoors. Shocking.
*Apparently there is a whole system for ranking your BIFF. I hope to never participate.
*I like my whitewater rafting rough.
*I am NOT addicted to my cell phone.
*I need to memorize Philippians 2:14-18 and apply it.

*Apparently deer slapping is a hobby?
*How much our students learn from the godly example of young adults they can look up to.
*If ground squirrels had the intelligence to match their tenacity, they would be ruling the world.
*It's good to get time away and focus on the Lord.

The Face of A Child Can Say It All, Especially the Mouth Part of the Face

Here are some of my favorite things said by kids (okay, mostly my kids...but I'm around them a lot):

Words of Wisdom by Jaxon:

*"Moms sure are beautifuller when their babies are littler. They just keep getting grosser and grosser." -while reading Love You Forever.

*"The Lord, the Lord has defeated all the injas!" - sung in a very low, monotone voice. (Injas are ninjas.)

*"Mom, will Jett and I be old men together?" (yes baby.) "Ok, well, will we live together when we are old." (If you want to I guess.) "Ok, well, I think we will be be best brothers forever and defeat ninjas."

*"When I get married I'm going to do gooder and gooder things for my womans. I wonder how many womans I'm going to have when I grow up."

*"So is Jaxon from the bible?" (Well no honey we just really liked that name.) "Oh. So you didn't give me like a ninja name or anything?" (No honey, we didn't know you'd like ninjas. But Jaxon Tate is an old cowboy name I think.) "Really? Which cowboy was he? Like from the movie we watched?" (Yeah like him the one who captured bad guys and saved the ladies.) "Well which one was he? The black hat one?" (Yeah honey that one.) "Hmmmm ok." -discussing how he was named

*"Mom I like strangers. Except the kind that say hey little kid come get in my car I got some candy for ya."

*(Bye Jaxon. I'll call you later.) "Ok mom... Wait, teleport or just call?" (Umm teleport..) "Ok."

*"I'm allergic to tornadoes."

*"I miss the old days." (Jaxon is 5!)

The World According To Haven:

*In the car as a semi hauling bales of hay passes, "That guy's got a big nest."

*Points to her nipples, "These are my ankles." Points to my chest, "You have ankles, too. Your ankles are big because you're big. My ankles are little...and clean. You need to wash your ankles."

*"Wat up, dude-Mom?"

*"I'm a good mouth talker!"

*Sigh..."This is hurting a lot." I look up to see a q-tip sticking out of each of her nostrils.

*After being straight-cathed at the ER..."It is NOT fun when the doctor pushes down on your bottom. Going to the playground is fun...pushing down your bottom...not fun."

*Brushing her hair out of her face..."My hair is on backward!"

*Me: "Is that something you can do by yourself?"

Buttercup: "Yes, only one thing...you have to help me."

*Bella, finding Buttercup in the laundry basket: "What's wrong?"

Buttercup: "Avery won't play fashion with me so now all I have to do is sit in this box and be alone."

*While looking into my sewing basket: "I found a measure of courage lit by hope's eternal flame!"

*"I have one brother and three moms!" (referring to her brother and three SISTERS)

*While "preaching": "What does the Bible say...about chapstick?"

*"Hannah, I'm going to light you on fire. Everything will be alright."

*Bella: "Just one more time Haven!"

Buttercup: "Okay! And then again and again and again!"

Big Kids are Funny, Too!

*Princeska to Bella: "I was thinking I could borrow one of your belts cause your hips aren't very big. Not as big as your head or anything."

* Bella: "Is gunmentery a word?"

Me: "Haha! No!"

Bella: "Rifleshippery?"

Me: "Riflery?"

*Lulu: I get why the lady in those tanning ads is really brown & wears a bikini everywhere, but why does she have a man voice? Did she get throat cancer, too???

*Bella: I teach children to literacy.

*Princeska (while listening to "Leader of the Pack): "I really like how he turns around and goes and picks her up on his motorcycle cause thats like, you know, true love!"

*Lulu: I think I just saw my cat fly by the window.

*Lulu: "So what's wrong with me?"

Bella: "Your brain is square."

Lulu: "Well that's no good. At least Monk could eat it on a sandwich."

*Lulu: "I have an ice cream lipstache!"

Bella: "You mean mustache?"

Lulu:"Uh no. It's on my lip not my mus!"

*Princeska: "The longest word in the dictionary is smile! Get it! S-mile! Mile!"

Bella: "What about league?"

Buttercup: "Or poop?!"

*When you're running there's no encouragement like a naked three year old doing jumping jacks while holding ping pong paddles and yelling, "Go Hannah go!!! Go Hannah go!!! Wow!!! You're so fast!!!"

*Lulu: "I'm pretty sure armadillos do indeed have magical powers. Have you seen those things?! Plumb unnatural."

*Lulu: "I bet I can name 5 animals with tusks right here and now"

Bella: "Go for it!"

Lulu: "Hog. Porcupine. Snake. Ballerina. Iguana. I win."

*Princeska: "I'm putting lots of detail to my paper snowman. It makes it fancier. Or as the cake boss says, it 'brings it to life.'

*Lulu: "You just can't trust a person with no teeth. If they can't afford dentures then they can't afford to be honest."

*Lulu: "Oh this loads really slow. When I try to get on it I open another window cause I get impatient. Or I put my hands on the screen and chant."

*Lulu's version of the Olive Garden commercials: "Hi! My family and I are all supermodels and love each other! These noodles are so good! It makes us burst into spontaneous laughter!!!"

*Bella: I think Dora's a hoarder. Have you seen what all she keeps in her backpack?! What are we teaching children these days?!

*Bella: There is a fine line between being tan and looking like you've rolled in doritos. Please fry yourself with discretion

*While cutting up sweet potatoes, Bella expressed her relief at finally coming across a skinny one that was easier to cut. Lulu reprimanded her, "Hannah, I'm ashamed. There is so much more to love in one of those fat yams. Don't be judgmental."

*Max: "You should play football with us next time!"

Bella: "but I'm really bad at football!!!"

Max: "well that's what practice is for you dingus!"

*Bubba-Man to Jackson: "We can shoot my bb gun, but we have to follow all the rules, like don't shoot the neighbor's dog..."

*Bella: (panicky) "Stop! What are you doing??? Don't drink after me!!!"

Caleb: "What?!?!"

Lulu: "They're like Romeo and Juliet!"

*Lulu: "You lured me in with your seductive voice! Oh ya. I forgot what your voice actually sounded like this morning."

*Lulu starts to dance...Bella: "Addy! Your butt dance is..."

Lulu: "Madly attractive?!"

Buttercup: "I think it's beautiful!"

Parenting Moments:

*Bubba-man: "What did the hospital do with my appendix?"

Dad: "Sold it to a Chinese restauraunt."

*Lulu: "Mother, will you smooth out your eyebrow?"

Me: lick finger and procede to smooth...

Lulu: "Uuuhhhhh, nope."

*We do highs and lows at the dinner table . One night J asked Buttercup, "Did you have a good high today?"

*Christmas quote of the year by J to Buttercup: "That's right, Haven. Baby Jesus is important, because without him, Christmas would be about Hell."

Runner's Remorse

I seem to have, in a momentary but deep lapse of judgement, agreed to run the Muddy Buddy race with my husband. Some people know Muddy Buddies as a delicious concoction of chex cereal coated in chocolate, peanut butter, and powdered sugar (also known as "puppy chow"). If you are one such person, do not be confused...this race, unfortunately, in no way involves tasty treats. What is a Muddy Buddy race, then? Basically, it is a team effort to both challenge yourself physically while simultaneously getting as dirty as humanly possible.

Here's how it works...

As previously mentioned, the race is run by partners. Racing partners start at the same time, one running and one biking. The 6 miles long course is separated into 5 legs by obstacles along the way. The first obstacle is near the one mile mark. Assuming that the biker is traveling faster than the runner, the biker will approach the first obstacles transition area first. The biker will drop the bike and conquer the obstacle and start running to the 2nd transition/obstacle. The runner will then approach the first transition area, conquer the obstacle, find the bike and start riding to the 2nd transition/obstacle area. The team will continue to leap frog throughout the course switching from biking and running along the way. Because the course has five legs. .
There will be five obstacles on each Muddy Buddy course. The obstacles can be challenges such as a cargo net crawl, a wall, monkey bars, or a hay bale obstacle. At the end of the race, teams have to conquer the famous Mud Pit before crossing the finish line together.

If this sounds like great fun to you, Jason may be looking for a new partner soon! I have tried to weasel my way out of this while at the same time trying not to look like a weenie. I've used the, "Maybe you'd like to compete with one of your cyclist friends...that way you'd actually have a chance to win..." method; the "Gosh, I sure hope my knees are up to this," cop-out; and the hugely unsuccessful, "What, the Muddy Buddy? I don't remember you asking me about that..." out-right lie. So far, he's not biting. Looks like I'm in, like it or not. Okay, knees, the rest of us is up for the challenge...don't fail me now!

Hodge Podge

Since I can't seem to formulate a complete sentence, let alone a coherent blog, here is a hodge podge of blog fodder.

*Avery Isabelle turned 7! She had 8 guests over to spend the night. Yes, I'm crazy. BUT, all of her friends seem to be having slumber parties, too, so apparently the slumber party is a required element of the first grader's social life.

*Haven Esther is a maniac. If we have it, she doesn't want it. When she gets hurt, she gets angry (yes, i realize she gets that from me). She knows a few sight words. Although I am trying feverishly to stunt her intellectual growth with fast food, movies, and not working with her at all, she seems intent on achieving child genius status. Haven will pee in the potty, but she will NOT poop in it.

*There is a pile of laundry on my chair that, if it topples over, could crush a small child...or a medium sized child.

*We are enjoying 4 soccer games every Saturday. Or, rather, we would be enjoying them if the Oklahoma wind didn't blow us sideways with every gust. Bub and Princeska are both playing, and Jason and I find ourselves parking our chairs in between fields and then looking from side to side like fans at an intense tennis match. At the fields, Haven: runs around, pets people's dogs, begs us for snacks we don't have while rejecting the ones we do have, follows a group of 5-7 year old girls around wherever they go, mooches beverages off of other soccer moms, and cheers for Avery & her team..."Goooooo, Funder! Good job, Avery! Shoot it, green!"

*There is a lot of green snot and coughing at my house. Yeah, it's great.

*It's almost summer. The words "bathing suit season" usually strike fear in my heart, but I just don't really care right now. Not that I think I'm going to be looking hot in my bikini, but I just have too many other things to worry about as of late. Besides, the way our summer schedule is shaping up, I'm not going to have a whole lot of time to swim.

*Hannah is taking physics. Ladies and Gentlemen, we have reached a subject that I am completely unable to help her with. Good times.

*Jason and I tried to get away to OKC for three days. We had a really nice hotel in bricktown...we had a suite. But, life happens and we actually spent less than 24 hours alone in our "love shack." The kids joined us the morning of the second day. Hannah and I napped and took in a movie while Jason took the other 4 to the zoo. We met up for supper and walked to a Mexican restaurant nearby where Haven so completely charmed the manager that he took $10 off our bill just because he liked her. The next morning we walked to the art fair downtown. We didn't get to spend much time browsing...mainly because Haddon kept insisting that "so much art bothers my eyes." Although, really, it WAS close to lunch time, Addy wandered off and scared me to death, and we hadn't brought anything to drink, so all those factors played in too. I was really disappointed. I'm really not disappointed in my children very much, but at the art fair, I didn't feel like our family was a cohesive group. I felt like we were just a bunch of individuals, all looking out for number one. We ate lunch at Toby Keith's I Love This Bar & Grill, then headed back to Woodward. We pulled up in our driveway two hours later to find a group of our church family cleaning up our backyard. We surprised them, too, since they weren't expecting us home until the next day! They were mowing, edging, raking, and sweeping. They were amazing. We walked in the house to find that they had also tidied there! AND they left fresh flowers and a basket of our favorite snacks on the table.

*Hannah is almost entirely in her senior subjects. I am panicking as college seems right around the corner. Am I ready for this? Is she?

*Lulu continues to prove that in spite of her unassuming exterior, inside dwells a spiritual superhero. She is amazing. Can't wait to go on mission with her in September. Look out, Guatemala, here we come!

*Bubba-man has been super hypochondriacal since his appendectomy. It's driving me CRAZY! What to do about that???

*I feel pulled in a million directions. One minute I'm fine, the next I'm crying in the middle of Taco Mayo. I feel sad that Hannah doesn't need me any more and frustrated that Haven needs me so much. I want to have it all together, but I can't seem to achieve that. I wish I could learn to not be so honest...or at least to just keep my mouth shut. I have so much to say that I don't know what to write.

Maybe there will be a coherent blog sometime in the near future. Or, maybe not.